Slice of Life, Slice of Ham

"These shoes are 300 dollars"

2007-11-28T09:12:00.000-08:00

This is my E-cv.
It's fun.
It's fresh.
Watch it from the beginning to the end, if you don't, I'll know it.
Furthermore, I have inserted naked pictures of me that are supposed to act on a subliminal level.

Hoax.

2007-11-28T09:01:00.000-08:00

There is one horrible threat on Internet that no one ever speak about.

It can lead to our poorest instincts.

It can lead anyone to lose ones self esteem, ones joy of living, ones happiness.

It touches every member of the family.

It can destroy you.

This threat is way beyond what you are told about the "threats on Internet", it is like a time remote bomb, like Hiroshima, like Britney without a pants hanging out with Paris and Nicole, and this threat has a name…

A HOAX.

Let's take a french example.

Bonjour à tous,

Je vous sollicite car une petite fille de 9 mois doit être sauvée. Noélie est atteinte d'une leucémie rare. Le seul moyen pour que cette petite ne décède pas dans moins de 2 mois ; c'est que vous tous vous vous monopolisiez pour trouver un donneur compatible. Ce donneur doit être un homme de moins de 40 ans avec ungroupe sanguin A Négatif. Je vous demande donc de bien vouloir communiquer à un maximum de gens cette information. D'avance merci à tous.

Poor Noélie.

In this example, nothing too terrible.

But.

Who hasn't ever got an email from a potential dictator who begs you to give him money in order to establish a democracy?Who hasn't ever feared the sum of pain that a chain letter you refuse to forward can bring you ?
I have personnaly received many mails from potential dictators in Afrika, who are very politeand who guarantee me a return on investisment if I give him a substantial donation.

Well. Imagine if it were my mom who got this mail.

You know the mothers, they are polite, nice, and they want to helpp democracy, especially when they have a subscription for Telerama.

Well. At this time, she wouldn't be able to afford a coat for the winter.

And she would freeze, alone, whereas a dictator would eat diamonds in the breakfast.

As you saw it, it can be really awfull, and lead everyone to the foolishest acts.
But.

There is one solution.

One website.

One way.

Hoaxbuster.

I hope this will save lives.

I hope every will live in peace in the world, without dirty and filthy jokes on dead people and democracy. I can't stand it anymore.

(This article has been exported from the Wiki)

Kelly.

2007-11-27T14:33:00.000-08:00

The new technologies, the participation, the 2.0, the things like that.. blah blah.
In my opinion, the main interest of all this stuff is that real funny people pop up on the web, become famous, and inspire people, for the best.

Shoes

Let Me Borrow That Top

Thanks to YouTube, I know what/who I want to be in my future. I want to be Kelly. I want to sing fu***ng efficient songs. I want to wear wigs. I want to talk about shoes. I want to think about my future video clips, and dream up fights of cheerleaders.
This is living.

A little bit of vocabulary.

2007-11-27T14:05:00.000-08:00

A podcast is a term to describe the technology used to push audio content on websites so people can listen to it on their iPod or on other audio player. The author of a podcast is called a podcaster. The term podcast comes from iPod and broadcasting.

This technology can also be used to push any kind of file, including pictures and videos.

Not surprisingly, musicians and bloggers are prevalent among the early adopters, but mainstream media organizations, including ZDNet are beginning into podcasting as well.

Many websites allow to make podcasts :

iTunes
Podemus
Yahoo! podcasts
Podcast.net

You can chitchat on everything you want. Such a pleasure.

But since I hate my voice, i won't do a single podcast.
Too bad.

"I wanna borrow that top"

2007-11-27T13:51:00.000-08:00

Prosper.com is an online marketplace that allow people to lend money to other people, even strangers...

This website highlights the issue of trust in the web and in the technical stuff developed to increase transactions' security on the Internet. Prosper.com uses several ways to make people trust in its services such as :
- pedagogy : the web site communicate a lot on its own use. See HOW TOs : "How to borrow" ; "How to lend" ; the Help page is very rich in information...
- ergonomic : prosper.com's layout is very clear, well-built, easy to read which encourage users in joining the community.
- relying on the community : people using prosper.com can rate each others which brings more credibility to users and at the same to the service provided by the website.

Thanks to this website, you can now proudly sing "I wanna borrow that cash"; and borrow every top you want.

$tock exchange, wtf ?!

2007-11-15T07:10:00.000-08:00

Google worths 1,93 billion $.

Oh My God, I don't give a damn.

Chris Crocker Vs Matthew Fashion.

2007-11-15T01:18:00.000-08:00

In my opinion, they are the two most famous starlets on the web by now.

The magnificient Chris Crocker is certainly the coolest, because he made it only through Internet and his stpefying vids. The most sent one is the infamous "Leave Britney Alone". I think that even my mom has seen it.
He talks about how to be a gay superstar in a lost town in a whatever homophobic country of the US, and he talks a lot about him, and how cool and famous he is. There's a vid, where he calls live a fan of him, and we can hear the fan yelling out of joy, and Chris stays cool and unimpressed.
It's hard to believe, but... :

The second one has nothing to envy to Chris Crocker. Matthew Fashion lives in Beverly Hills, he knows (or at least "meets") many famous people and has many pictures of him smiling and embracing these celibrities.
He has a concept of his own, which seems to be also his stage name : Fashionality (Fashion + Personality).
I discovered him on the god-blessed tv-show "Next", and i saw him again with great pleasure on "Exposed". Although "Exposed" is a lame program, Matthew Fashion is still funny.
Watch him in action in Exposed :

The common points between the two are numerous : they are two extravagant young gays, who have real problems with ther wardroom ; they obtained a tv-show thanks to their fame (a real-tv like documentary) ; and they love themselves.
However, Chris has a very long wikipedia page, and Matthew hasn't yet. And Matthew seems to be more "multimedia" than Chris, who appeared on tv lately.
Two big differences : Chris used Internet to become famous and now takes advantage of his exposition to merge his "activities" on tv. Matthew became "international" thanks to tv-shows, and exploited this fame with Internet. Moreover, Matthew seems to have a bigger legitimacy, since he is a stylist, and can speak not only about himself, but also about fashion.
Well, that's just my opinion.

Fame in the XXIth Century works in mysterious ways.

Orkut

2007-11-11T07:43:00.000-08:00

Did you know that Google had its own social network ?

I have discovered it lately, while searching another dating website, gnihihi. Although it's difficult for me to say that, I think that this network is so beyond Facebook, that it has no interest.
The comparison with Facebook can't be avoided now, and, Orkut can't hold the comparison at all.

First of all, the site is full of Brazilians. Everywhere you see abs, boobs, tongues. This makes the shy boy inside me puke out of resentment.
There is no moderation : at least three fake Hillary Clinton profiles, and one single Barack Obama, with only four friends... It doesn't make sense.
It is polluted with spams, hoaxs, sexy websites, and other hidden ads.

These three mere watchings are enough for me to be bored by this website. No way to meet someone via this network. Unless you want to meet Cristina, who had her surgery three months ago, and who is so proud of her new breast that she shows it on every picture. (I can give you her real name, if she may be your kind of girl)

In a nutshell : useless.

(Look how fun it can be to puke on a Google service. For once they are not the best, let's enjoy it a minute or two - just before checking ones gmail account, using google images, posting on blogger and working on a google-docs)

Social Networkings Vs Meeting Sites.

2007-11-08T07:07:00.001-08:00

Facebook Vs Meetic
MySpace Vs Match.com

Can these fights be relevant ?

I think so. Many articles in some newspapers have recently described one big trend in MySpace and Facebook, that leads users to chat up, flirt, hit on -name it like you want-, on websites that wasn't originally designed for this use.
The MySpace parties are said to be big hook-ups parties. Since I don't have a MySpace account (music is so boring), I can't join these parties, but what if the real aim of these social networks was to physically link with other users ?
Flirting via social nietworks must be seen as less humiliating as in Meetic. If you meet your girlfriend on MySpace, it says something about you (= you're cool, you listen hype music, you go and listen concerts in the dark places of Paris). If you meet someone on Meetic, it is less funky (= you are certainly a rich loser, you are too shy to meet in real life, there are chances that you are peverse).

MySpace and Facebook are free, are popular, are full of young flesh. I guess it is seen like an easier way for cool-men to grab young ladies, for there are no longer the uninhibited codes of the dating websites, codes that are inhibiting for some ("What do you want ? Do you search something in particular ? What do you like during the sex ? Is there a problem if a bring a friend ?").

Anyway, read Technikart if you want more.

Inbox : One New Message.

2007-11-08T05:57:00.001-08:00

From : Mika K
Date : 04-Sept-2007 17:29
"Jprend 1ver avc Jerem à la belette, pui ptet jirai ché lui voir Virg, jsai pa tro en fait. Keep u in tuch"

Everything has ever been written about the Short Messages on the mobile.
Don't count on me to add something original, new, flashy-funky-groovy, or even relevant.

However.
I am pretty sure than no one has ever dared to talk about the dating via SMS. In the little channels on the TNT, or in the cable, there are loads of ads, showing young smiling tanned people who feel soooo lonely in the town they have just moved in. And guess what, if you send "Date", or "Chat", or "Love", or "Plan" through an overtaxed numero, you can chat with these beautiful people !
This mere idea arouses me everytime I see the ads -and I see maybe 20 minutes of the same ads every evening, I let you figure out how I can be aroused.

It's a shameful way of meeting people, but hey, who has never felt lonely in a big city (like Paris?) after living in a town of 1.000 or so inhabitants (like where i came from?) ?

But, let's face the truth, I doubt that someone has ever meet a real chick by using "Date", "Hookup" or "Plan". As much as the dating websites are efficient (and I can prove that), this SMS-system sucks (I can't prove that, because my mom pays my phone bills and I am a nice kid).

I can only be dead certain that it is above all the most expensive way of wasting your time, nothing more. The "Minitel Rose" was efficient at its time -I have loads of testimonies from flirt veterans-, Internet is so successful by now, but I don't predict the same success for the users of dating via SMS.

The media-convergence faces here an obstacle. You can't repeat a free-or so- system with an overtaxed device. No chance.
And such a pity.

E-Learning

2007-10-25T05:00:00.000-07:00

According to me, E-Learning was just a process that would allow motivated seniors to enlarge their skills and raise their wages. My father tries to learn english with e-learning lessons provided from his company. But he is not motivated enough.

Actually, there's more to say about that (and more boring things, I must admit).

I've just read that e-learning can lead to a qualification. It makes sense, but i wouldn't have thought about it by myself (=too boring). And it is more and more organized : the French University of Paris Dauphine has a platform dedicated to e-learning, and it logically leads to a degree (Licence or Master). But what the fuck, it costs 4.000 € a year. E-learning doesn't unfortunately rely on having high-speed connection : you sure need money.

There is another way to learn English, if you have quitted studies long time ago.
In Caen, for example, there is the IAE ("L'institut d'Administration des Entreprises"), supported by the European Union (like the most organisations of that type I guess), which seems to be well done, with an hotline, a cyberlibrary, videos, etc... Actually, I don't know if every e-learning section offer these tools ; if not, what's the point of running a e-learning service ?! The price is higher in Caen, it costs 6.000 € for a Master 2.

In a nutshell : don't quit the University, because learning will become so expensive later...

So Jealous.

2007-10-16T13:49:00.001-07:00

The day I can make a resume like that, I will see Bob cry out of joy. And I'm sure it would be fun.

http://pixelpharmacy.com/2002/

Talented and fun. The guys from Quebec make me sick.

The Ham

2007-10-04T05:57:00.000-07:00

The Ham, the meat, the pig, the lamb, the calf...
In these tiny and anonymous words is gathered an entire world of innocent pleasure.

You know the most common use to make with ham, meat, pig... : it's to EAT this.
But there's a funnier way to enjoy your sad and rainy days : you can make hats of meat !

As you see, you can be at work, and have a very elegant hat. This model is really easy to adjust to your headset, and to your religious view.

Your week-end, your day off, your holiday can now become much funnier than it was with this georgous sun-meat-hat.

You are a hooker and you want to offer somehting different to your easily bored customers ?
You are a teacher who lacks of authority ?
You want to gain in selfconfidence ?
Try this very sophisticate bacon-saussage-hat. You'll be pleased.

Don't forget the most important thing about gastronomy, it's just a question of tolerance, and taste, and bleedy meat.

_{More informations about these hats on http://www.hatsofmeat.com/}

American Idol. Enjoy.

2007-09-27T05:51:00.000-07:00

American Idol is not only the "most broadcasted TV-show in the world", or, according to me, the american funniest real-tv, but it is also a model of generosity and sharing.

Well...

It's not really obvious when Simon Cowell likes being mean-mean-mean against poor rednecks.

And it's not really obvious when you watch people crying, being mad, or having a very embarassing reaction because they got fired of the show.

At first sight then, generosity doesn't seem to be the purpose of the show.
It's maybe for this reason that there was a special show on the sixth season, the "Idol Gives Back" special.
It was a two-parts show, co-hosted, with a double-cause, two different stages, a row of stars and an army of partners.
A plethoric show.
The aim was to save your favorite singer (there were only six left), who sang two songs, and every call brought money. This money is supposed to help Louisiana and Africa. So it's not like if you only give to Africa, nonono. Simple and so efficient.
About one month before, there was teasing in the show ("don't forget our special "Idol Gives back" nia nia nia..."), some videos in order to fuel the incredible mystery around this show (who would be the stars ? how much America can give ? what sponsor would be the most generous ? will the sexy Chris Richardson be still there ?).
Sanjaya left, Chris was still there, and the "Idol Gives Back" show began.

The Simpsons were there :

The President Bush and his wife were there too.
Carrie Underwood. Pink. Aguilera.
(okay, at this point, I admit that this is just name-dropping to have a better place in the search engines)

Anyway, because of that, the production is now forced to do the same tralala every year. And it's good, no ?

Generosity ? Wtf ?

2007-09-27T04:52:00.000-07:00

It's embarassing to admit, but i don't give much to people that beg for money, or for food, or cigarettes.

Last week in the subway, a 40-some guy, who is often on the twelfth subway-line, started yelling against every people in the wagon, saying that he was losing his mind, and that he was ready to "make a mistake". Because nobody gave him money, or a cigarette... I felt terrible.
The next day, same time same place and the same guy. I had two euros in my pocket, and was ready to give him, not only because i felt terrible and wanted to clean-up my middle-class guiltiness, but also because, well, he needed money.
So I grabbed my two euro coin, i was SO ready to give it to him, but he never came to me because he talked with a nice granny.
I felt even more awkard, the coin in my hand, the guy not so far from me, but also not close enough. He jumped out of the subway. From now, I haven't seen him again.

Anyway.
Being generous in the virtual world is much easier. Going in a forum, answering a question about a TV-show for a poor lost web-user who is so grateful afterwards ; letting many users downloading ~~incest porn~~, euh.., tv-shows from your computer ; being an active member of the french ham community...
So little commitment, so many generosity.
I don't want to leave my flat anymore, the outside world is too embarassing.